by Blood Shack isn’t a great or even good movie. I stumbled upon it several years ago when Netflix just started streaming movies (seems like a hundred years ago now) and instantly hated it. This obscure slow moving horror film just didn’t do it for me, but it did stick out in my head for some reason. Over a decade later I got the sudden itch to give it another look, and upon watching it again I wanted to talk about it and what better way than in a review? Blood Shack isn’t as bad as I remember, but it’s certainly not a masterpiece or even competent horror film by any stretch of the imagination.
The story here begins with a bit of narration talking about a legend in an unnamed valley about an age old killer called the chooper. We then see the chooper’s supposed dwelling as a group of young adults driving through dare each other to stay the night. Of the trio the only female is the one person who is brave enough to stay and face her fate, and despite warnings from the groundskeeper Daniel (who can’t seem to, for the life of him, keep a shirt on) she is determined to show up her chauvinistic friends. The chooper (a killer in a jumpsuit who wields a saber) makes quick work of her, and in the morning Daniel disposes of the body so as to avoid trouble. The new proprietor of the estate this shack lies on, Carol (Carolyn Brandt), arrives the next morning as she has just inherited the estate.
She steps out of the car and is immediately bombarded with an offer by the incessant Tim Foster who is hell bent on buying the land. Carol isn’t ready to commit to such an offer and wants to stay a few days and get her head on straight. At night she feels drawn to the little shack with the murderous history but Daniel stops her from entering it knowing full well that the chooper awaits any trespassers. Eventually the husband of the first victim shows up to find his missing wife, and he too meets a dastardly fate along with the local constable, and a few other well meaning victims. The body count stacks up and it’s becoming too much for Daniel to keep hiding, but he beckons the chooper to keep killing so the old house doesn’t get torn down.
The format of Blood Shack’s storytelling is interesting to say the least. There’s an emphasis on narration here that just doesn’t fit. I suspect this was done to pad out the runtime because it is used to fill in shots with little to no action or story. Blood Shack often loses its focus however. Carol narrates on a number of topics that have little or nothing to do with the story. For example, one sequence has her describing how the local children like her and how they got a new pony named Peanut, or there’s another that’s a long and drawn out history of the land she inherited. These add almost nothing to the story and I found her narrated sequences to be boring. The worst offender as far as padding the runtime however are the rodeo sequences. At one point in the story the rodeo comes to town and they just threw in a bunch of rodeo footage. I’ve since learned that this was deliberately done to pad the runtime, but it makes the bad pacing even worse.
This brings me to the chooper himself; the very premise of the film. This antagonist is kind of the best thing ever, but not in a good way. He’s basically a man in a jumpsuit, hood and mask who runs around screaming at the top of his lungs while clumsily holding a saber out. He does robotic stabbing motions on his victims as if he’s not even trying, and the way he holds it (like he’s throwing a javelin) is hilarious on an almost unprecedented level. There’s nothing remotely scary about this guy and most people will laugh at the sheer absurdity of any sequence in which he’s featured. It’s so bad I was left wondering how any of the actors could keep a straight face while facing this maniac. The only way I would recommend this film is for people who are looking for a good laugh instead of a serious thriller.
While casual horror fans will be instantly bored to tears there are a few things for the more serious fans. Blood Shack has a small cult following and it isn’t hard to see why; it actually does manage to do a few things well and the chooper is so goofy he’s an absolutely unforgettable villain. This one is a pretty good pick if you’re looking for a laugh, but otherwise you should steer clear because the pacing makes it a bit of a slog to watch and the predictable finale is certainly not worth waiting around for. At less than an hour runtime it isn’t the big commitment so many other horror films are, but it’s absolutely ridiculous that even being so short they had to pad the run-time.
Pros
- Unintentionally funny
- Nice atmosphere
Cons
- Cheesy
- Bad acting
- Lots of runtime padding
