by The Ice Cream Man is a horror film I have a vague memory of once renting in my early teens. I was always on the look out for obscure but frightening scary flicks, but this one I had only vague memories of and I couldn’t even recall if I liked or hated it. What I do remember is that the film had one heck of a great cover with Clint Howard holding an ice cream cone full of body parts which, to a child, is pretty impressionable. I decided to give it a second look to see if there was a reason I can remember next to nothing about it. Unfortunately I should have left this one in my past; while it has a modern cult following the Ice Cream Man is worse than your run of the mill slasher film. One thing’s for certain; no one is screaming for ice cream here.
This flick starts in a flashback sequence of sorts. We have a model American suburban neighborhood wherein a gentle ice cream man is serving up frozen treats to the children. Suddenly he is gunned down by an unseen assailant from a car who speeds off leaving one lone boy by the dead man’s side finishing his ice cream. Fast forward a few decades later. This same little boy is now all grown up named Gregory Tudor (Clint Howard), and has taken over the role of the local ice cream man. Unfortunately he still has a few screws as we learn from his creepy interactions with the local children, and then we see that things are not quite right in his truck with cockroaches crawling in his ice cream and blood stains everywhere. Gregory lives on the property of his former nurse who isn’t quite all there either. For one she lets him pay for his rent in ice cream, and she also has no idea that he’s behind the numerous disappearances around town. You see, our merchant of frozen treats has been disposing of bodies by mixing them in with his ice cream and feeding them to the local townsfolk as we soon witness one of the local police officers eating a serving of eyeball sorbet.
Four of the local kids know something isn’t quite right with Gregory, and while they’re suspicious of him that doesn’t stop them from buying ice cream from him. It isn’t until one of the group witnesses the ice cream man loading an unconscious child into his truck in the dead of night that their suspicions are confirmed. He warns the kids that if they tell anyone their parents will be in danger. He proves that he means business when he begins stalking them; parking in front of their homes in the middle of night and even chasing one of the group through a crowded grocery store. Meanwhile the kidnapped child remains in his ice cream store as Gregory teaches him the ins and outs of making delicious ice cream, but he is kept hidden while the police investigate him after responding to one of the children’s calls to them. People start going missing around town, and because the police can’t find any evidence it’s up to the group of children to prove the Ice Cream Man’s guilt before he gets them, that is.
It’s not that I didn’t expect a horror-comedy going in, I mean, this is a dark film about an ice cream man of all things. The problem is that the movie’s direction constantly changes and the whole thing is off balance. This makes the film pretty difficult to watch to be honest; when given the opportunity to zig it instead zags. I went in open minded and thought the premise had real potential, but it’s far too goofy for its own good. It feels like a dark children’s movie, but has far too much gore and adult themes for that. The filmmakers were really confused with what direction to take, and instead of honing their focus they gave us an uneven mess. One high point is Clint Howard who really schlocks it up with his performance. He can be creepy when he leers, but also manages to draw sympathy from the audience. He tried to complicate the character and add a lot of depth, but the source material really held him back. The one legitimate jump scare is ruined as we soon have him jump off of his truck and club two police officers with ice cream scoops while smiling maniacally only to later work their heads (and mouths) like a puppeteer. This is a very confused film.
The Ice Cream Man is an uneven confused mess of a slasher film. The story and scenario (with children as the main characters) is better suited for a younger audience, but the gore and violence makes it highly inappropriate for that niche. It’s purposely cheesy such to the point that it loses all effectiveness as a horror film, and the cast of characters are highly unlikable which makes it a real slog to sit through. This one is better left to rot in the realm of direct to home video horror films.
Pros
- Some funny moments
Cons
- Very boring
- Uneven
- Messy story
